How can something so wonderful taste so mediocre when it goes through what's typically a beneficial process? Dried fruits regularly rule. Dried strawberries, dried mango, dried papaya? All of that shit is fucking delicious. I'm of course talking about prunes being the black sheep of dried fruits.
I don't know the deal with them and why they're so popular with the elderly - there are other, tastier sources of insoluble fiber including dark leafy greens (hello last entry, dandelion greens?) and whole wheat products. I always thought it was a stereotype, but after working in produce long enough I can verify that it's fucking truth. There's one dude who used to regularly come into the store who'd always ask where the prunes were (even though they never sprouted feet and fucking moved, to my knowledge) and then he'd sit in the fucking cafe for an hour. He'd always read my nametag and repeat my name in the most grating, obnoxious manner. "Okay, Robert." Shit got so obnoxious so quickly. Note for the customers - calling me by my first name pisses me the fuck off and makes me more paranoid than a 13 year old kid trying to jerk off at a family computer. If you're calling me by my first name, I assume you're trying to drill it into your memory so you can report me for some trivial bullshit at a later time; it makes me feel like I'm on display.
Back to the prunes: once in Jr. High my home economics teacher offered to give me extra time on a project if I ate a prune. I hated it. Of course, back then I ate tons of Burger King and Wendys bullshit and limited my diet to shit high in sodium and fat. I'm not trying to sound like a snob, but after not eating meat for the longest time I really became more appreciative of food in general - because I didn't limit myself to what was cheap and convenient.
I figured last Tuesday that I'd get some paczki for paczki day and thought maybe now I'd have some prune tolerance. Nope, prune still taste like dick cheese. Actually, the prune filling reminded me slightly of sesame filling in pastries, but a lot worse.
So speaking of paczkis - how many of you assholes had paczkis on paczki day? When I was a little kid I used to get something like them at Ritos Bakery in Parma.
European food rules. I used to always get kolaches at Ritos, and I used to get pierogies from St. Josaphats. When I was living in Tucson I couldn't find a single pierogi that wasn't Mrs.Ts, and I was hard-pressed to find a good kolache or European bakery for that matter.
People are total dickwads to even suggest that the Southwest is somehow superior to the Midwest, because you're near the border and have access to good Mexican food; as far as my knowledge goes, good Mexican food is all over - but good European food only has its pockets in some of the more culturally diverse cities. Give me pierogies made by old Slovak grandmas or give me death. The West Side market also has great fucking pierogies, especially the sweet and sour red cabbage pierogies.
Next weekend I'm hopefully entering a pierogi eating contest at a local bar that puts on most of the good punk and hardcore shows in the city. I can't wait to wear my "I [heart] Parma" shirt, dance to "Who Stole the Kishka?," and eat pierogies until I puke. Maybe I'll even win money.
European food and cultural diversity are the first reason Cleveland rules.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Entry #12: Dandelion Greens
If I had the resources to become incredibly educated on one single family or group of fruits or vegetables, I would love to learn about all commonly sold greens. Greens are a great group of vegetables, and are usually good sources of minerals like iron and calcium that people usually employ in arguments against vegetarianism/veganism by claiming they're hard to come by without meat and dairy products. I never gave dandelion greens a thought until an old Italian woman came in my work asking about "straight endive" and was apparently mistaking dandelion for a variation of endive. Again, like I said in a previous entry - European ladies always rule. Since it was a relatively slow day, I curiously asked how she uses her greens. Her recommendation was cooking them with olive oil and putting them underneath pasta or serving them as a side dish. Hell, I'm a huge fan of kales, spinach, arugula, and turnip greens - so I wasn't very apprehensive about trying a new and unfamiliar green.
Once I got off work I bought two pounds of vine tomatoes, a white onion, basil, and a bunch of dandelion greens. I figured I'd make a second attempt at making pasta sauce from scratch (my last attempt resulted in really thick and seedy sauce that tasted way too "earthy" and bland). Of course my fucking workplace gave my pockets a wallet-raping, and the total bill was $12.34. The greens were surprisingly the least expensive item, ringing up at around $2.03.
Everybody I ask, including that Italian woman, tells me that I need to buy crushed or diced tomatoes in a can to make pasta sauce. This kind of pisses me off, because I don't want my shit coming from a can full of preservatives and all tons of other fuck. I was stubborn and again tried putting my tomatoes in a blender and just slow cooking out all the moisture.
I made a base with my garlic basil olive oil and the onion; meanwhile, I put the tomatoes (this time I gutted most of them so I wouldn't have as much excess water and seeds), basil, seasalt, black pepper, fresh garlic, a single mint leaf, and a sprinkle of sugar in the blender. After the base was finished and the onions were a little browned, I poured the contents of the blender in with the base. I cut up a carrot and put it in the mixture, figuring it would add a little bit of nutritional value. After about 2 hours of cooking it was at where I'd consider it finished, and I started cooking the pasta and the greens (separately, of course).
Apparently I'm a shitty fucking chef, and I just throw tons of shit together like I'm tossing paint on a canvass and expecting results. My sauce tasted like fish dick, and was even more bland than last time. The greens were very bitter, and the olive oil was too heavy. On a whole, the entire experience was a failure, even if I made a relatively nutritious meal and I kept myself productive.
For random scientific information, I looked up a few bits of nutritional information from credible online sources. I feel like I'm fucking Alton Brown and I need to impart some sort of "scientific" information unknown to the audience at large.
I searched the CSPI (Center for Science in the Public Interest) database, and I got links to http://www.nutritiondata.com/ and http://www.allnatural.net/.
The former states that 1 cup of chopped dandelion only has 24.7 calories and 41.8 mgs of sodium (compare that to the 1,000mgs+ that you'll find in bullshit processed foods like ramen), but also has 8% of your daily recommended fiber, 112% vitamin A, 535% vitamin K, and has good amounts of plenty of vitamins and minerals across the board including 10% of your daily recommended calcium and 9% of your recommended iron. Dandelion greens certainly aren't any sort of superfood like spirulina, but they have a little of a lot, kind of like sprouts.
For the latter link, dandelion greens have been used as a diuretic and as an appetite stimulant. Their French name is pissenlit, meaning "wet the bed," and their high potassium content compensates for the frequent urination they induce. They're also used as a mild laxative. I may have to brush myself up on the topic, but I'm pretty sure dandelion is used in plenty of Naturopathic remedies.
In conclusion, even though the food I made tasted like a bitter asshole, dandelion greens are definitely something worth checking out. I'm going to try and incorporate them in more recipes, and try and learn to use them properly. I also want to start foraging my own greens.
Once I got off work I bought two pounds of vine tomatoes, a white onion, basil, and a bunch of dandelion greens. I figured I'd make a second attempt at making pasta sauce from scratch (my last attempt resulted in really thick and seedy sauce that tasted way too "earthy" and bland). Of course my fucking workplace gave my pockets a wallet-raping, and the total bill was $12.34. The greens were surprisingly the least expensive item, ringing up at around $2.03.
Everybody I ask, including that Italian woman, tells me that I need to buy crushed or diced tomatoes in a can to make pasta sauce. This kind of pisses me off, because I don't want my shit coming from a can full of preservatives and all tons of other fuck. I was stubborn and again tried putting my tomatoes in a blender and just slow cooking out all the moisture.
I made a base with my garlic basil olive oil and the onion; meanwhile, I put the tomatoes (this time I gutted most of them so I wouldn't have as much excess water and seeds), basil, seasalt, black pepper, fresh garlic, a single mint leaf, and a sprinkle of sugar in the blender. After the base was finished and the onions were a little browned, I poured the contents of the blender in with the base. I cut up a carrot and put it in the mixture, figuring it would add a little bit of nutritional value. After about 2 hours of cooking it was at where I'd consider it finished, and I started cooking the pasta and the greens (separately, of course).
Apparently I'm a shitty fucking chef, and I just throw tons of shit together like I'm tossing paint on a canvass and expecting results. My sauce tasted like fish dick, and was even more bland than last time. The greens were very bitter, and the olive oil was too heavy. On a whole, the entire experience was a failure, even if I made a relatively nutritious meal and I kept myself productive.
For random scientific information, I looked up a few bits of nutritional information from credible online sources. I feel like I'm fucking Alton Brown and I need to impart some sort of "scientific" information unknown to the audience at large.
I searched the CSPI (Center for Science in the Public Interest) database, and I got links to http://www.nutritiondata.com/ and http://www.allnatural.net/.
The former states that 1 cup of chopped dandelion only has 24.7 calories and 41.8 mgs of sodium (compare that to the 1,000mgs+ that you'll find in bullshit processed foods like ramen), but also has 8% of your daily recommended fiber, 112% vitamin A, 535% vitamin K, and has good amounts of plenty of vitamins and minerals across the board including 10% of your daily recommended calcium and 9% of your recommended iron. Dandelion greens certainly aren't any sort of superfood like spirulina, but they have a little of a lot, kind of like sprouts.
For the latter link, dandelion greens have been used as a diuretic and as an appetite stimulant. Their French name is pissenlit, meaning "wet the bed," and their high potassium content compensates for the frequent urination they induce. They're also used as a mild laxative. I may have to brush myself up on the topic, but I'm pretty sure dandelion is used in plenty of Naturopathic remedies.
In conclusion, even though the food I made tasted like a bitter asshole, dandelion greens are definitely something worth checking out. I'm going to try and incorporate them in more recipes, and try and learn to use them properly. I also want to start foraging my own greens.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Entry #11: Guy Fieri
I've never met a single living person who actually openly likes Guy Fieri. Guy represents so many cheesy, dickbag stereotypes in one conveniently gelled and styled package.Today at work, my coworker and I stood around and thought of different stereotypes associated with people similar to Guy. Honestly, if you took "I Just Saw the Gayest Guy on Earth" by Anal Cunt and shifted the lyrical focus from Massachusetts to California, you'd have a song very fitting for Guy Fieri.
Guy Fieri is totally the type of dude who has an entire closet full of fucking bowling shirts; chances are half of his shirts, bowling shirts included, have flame, 8 ball, or dragon imagery. You know that episode of Tim and Eric Awesome Show with their alter-personas Jim and Derrick? Remember the skit about tattoos? Yeah, totally Guy Fieri. Chances are Guy Fieri has literally fucking sat around contemplating tribal tattoos (if he doesn't have a few already). He's also the kind of person who goes to Chilis and orders mojitos and drinks lite beer. When he's at Chilis he probably pinches the waitress' ass, and refers to girls as "chicks" or "babes" and talks about sex stories with his male workout buddies (altough his idea of "working out" is probably drinking Muscle Milk and sitting on leg presses checking out "babes"). Guy has a classic car and probably has little or no knowledge regarding its maintenance. If Guy wasn't a famous chef, he'd be the customer who comes in asking for "guacamoles."
Nearly every recipe I've watched on his show somehow incorporates avocado or ginger. He's almost as one dimensional as Bobby Flay, who always tries his best to make any recipe into some "Southwestern" clusterfuck. Guy's "cooking style" seems to be fruitty Californian bar food.
I would place bets that Guy is the kind of dude who stocks up on chips and salsa for Superbowl Sunday and it's the only day of the entire year he actually watches football. Instead, he probably watches "extreme" sports and the winter Olympics.
Whenever you're at the store and you see those goofy fucking $30 "sleek" sunglasses with yellow tinted lenses that make you wonder, "who the fuck would buy that?" Guy Fieri is who would buy that. To sum up my article thus far, Guy represents nearly everything cheesy and lame that gives California a negative image (in the same respects Family Guy gives atheists a negative image). As far as the West Coast, Guy truly is "The Gayest Guy on Earth." If any of the aforementioned stereotypes apply to you as the reader, then you have a very "Fieri" personality and you should probably go back to scouting for chicks in bars and drinking Natty Ice.
Guy is yet another reason why California sucks.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Entry #10: Plantains
This entry isn't the result of an ignorant or inconsiderate customer, nor is the following entry resulting from my like or dislike of plantains. I rarely ever use fucking plantains, if ever. I've had plantain chips before, like from Trader Joe's or homemade ones doled (pun was totally intentional) out to the class during diversity projects in high school.No, I'm making room for this entry to openly criticize Seth McFarlane, Family Guy, and its followers and fanbase. I'm still convinced that in some circle of hell, there's the most god awful fucking movie to ever exist being readied for the servants of hell. In this movie, titled "Young Santa," it stars Will Farrell as a teenage son of Santa, preparing himself for his first year carrying out his father's duties. John C. Reilly is the voice of Rudolph, and there are cameo appearances from Dave Chappelle and Dane Cook. One of the main protagonists would be Michael Cera starring as an awkward youth whose only desired Christmas present is true love. The entire script would be written by Seth McFarlane and it would be popping out the seams with tons of anti-Christianity jokes and totally predictable atheist ramblings. Of course all the fucking demons are rubbing their fiendish hands, just awaiting for Seth to be damned to start writing this script.
Last night I was watching an episode of Family Guy, season 3 episode 5, aptly titled "And the Weiner is..." The episode is basically about Peter discovering that his son Chris has a bigger dick than him. The true weiner in this episode is Seth McFarlane. When the Griffins are at the supermarket, Chris picks up a bunch of nino bananas and comments on how small they are. Of course Peter relates the bananas to penis length and takes Chris' comment as an indirect insult. The dialogue goes as follows:
Chris: Dad, look at these little bananas!
Peter: You smug little bastard!
Lois: Peter! Chris, these are plantains. And there's nothing wrong with them. In fact, a lot of women prefer them to normal-size bananas because they're exotic and flavorful and very special.
Peter: Sure, Lois. All the sorority girls are clamoring for the plantain section. Stop with this!
The problem lies in the fact that they're not fucking plantains. I feel like such a fraud because I have to consult wikipedia whenever I'm unsure of something that demands immediate information. Sometime in the near future I should probably invest in some sort of botanical dictionary. Anyways, there are hundreds of variations of bananas. Apparently banana and plantain can be used interchangably in most situations (since there is "no formal botanical distinction between bananas and plantains"). One variation of plantain is the bocadillo plantain. I can't find any information here online on whether or not bocadillo plantains are synonymous with nino/baby bananas. For my own benefit I may try and go to the library soon and get a conclusive answer. Regardless, we're arguing conventions in nomenclature and identification. If they're synonymous and there's no distinction, are we to go by precedence or popularity? In this case, I'm opting popularity. The smaller bananas are popularly known as either baby bananas or nino bananas, and when somebody thinks of a plantain they typically think of the longer, more spotted bananas used almost universally for cooking. If bocadillo plantains are indeed something entirely independent of nino bananas and they are in fact not synonymous I doubt that fictional grocery store would carry them. Most grocery stores carry only "plantains," nino/baby bananas, Cavendish bananas (standard "bananas"), red bananas, and burro or Chinese bananas if you're lucky; it's very unlikely some major grocer in Rhode Island would carry some exotic fucking bastard son of plantain.
Back on the topic of Family Guy: nearly every opinion expressed on the show is recycled dog shit that publicly gives reason for people to dislike self-proclaimed atheists. It's like Seth McFarlane uses the show as a vehicle for his opinions on topical issues, and he's somewhere in Hollywood slowly stroking his own dick at the very thought of his opinions somehow being groundbreaking or insightful. At least Trey Parker and Matt Stone somehow serve up opinions on current issues that may not be entirely obvious to the general American population. Oh yeah Seth? Christians are "hypocrites," abortion is a woman's choice, abstinence education is detrimental to our children, marijuana should be smoked by everybody, war is "stupid" and our current situation in the Middle East is based entirely on oil, politicians are susceptible to greed, and the Dark Ages' lack of scientific progress was solely the result of dogmatic Christian censorship? Either Seth wrote the entire book on edgy, predictable liberalism, or he stole Jon Stewart's notes.
I don't want to argue any of these points because they're either incredibly surface-level interpretations of current issues, or they're so blatantly obvious and yet somehow wrapped in the pretense of self importance that they're not even worth debating.
Seth McFarlane gives yet another bad source of information to cite for obnoxious, proud atheists.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Entry #9: Bagged Salad
Bagged salads are possibly one of the largest rip-offs to ever exist, at least of those fresh on my mind. The only products I can think of in the produce department that even compare are those plastic containers shaped like garlic cloves or tomatoes that you keep your respective vegetables in to keep "fresh." My biggest peeve regarding bagged salads is when people pay as much money for a small fucking bag of shredded iceberg as they would for a large head probably three times its weight. I know it's only a dollar and some change that you're wasting, but are you honestly that much of a lazy fucking dickhead to not just get a large knife and chop a head of iceberg yourself? Actually, listen to my older entry and just skip the iceberg altogether. The only excuse for chopped iceberg is Mexican food, and in which case I'd probably have more fun chopping the fuck out of a large head of lettuce, plus I wouldn't have to buy two fucking bags to not run out.
I also hate the American blend salad, and I think it's the equivalent of buying a factory sealed bag of hard brown floaters; the American blend salad is just iceberg, radish, and carrots. If you can find yourself some italian dressing you can have yourself a salad from Olive Garden or a side salad from Wendys. Fucking fantastic.
Most of the bagged salads are made of up cheap ingredients, other than the Parisian blend with frisee. One other exception is the popular Italian blend, which is actually one of the relatively better deals since it has endive in it and it's among the cheapest salads. Bagged salads however, on a whole, still represent a major wallet fucking and the small population that I referenced in a previous entry that believe salads are the only healthy thing you can eat. They sell so fucking quickly and people toss the fuck out of the bags. I constantly have to put misplaced salads into their proper feeders, since customers have to toss a salad they second guessed into the feeder immediately below where it goes - because it's an inconvenience to reach a few inches higher and place it in its proper fucking place. The worst is when customers throw bagged salads ontop of potatoes or in random unrefridgerated places. Dicks.
Right now I'm pretty "salty" because I have cuts all over my right arm from shoving salads behind the feeders. I get really antsy when there are tons of customers crowding my space, and I just shove salads in their feeders as quickly and carelessly as possible. Every customer thinks I'm obligated to step back every time one of them wants through the aisle, instead of walking a few feet away and taking another clear path. Nope, their path has to somehow involve them being intrusive in my work.
Bagged salads bother me on a deeper level, because they are a perfect manifestation of the pampered, powdered, and dick-rubbed lives of convenience that Americans simply cannot abandon. All of those conveniences tallied up are a key contributer to our high obesity rates, and by opting convenience over slow and hard work you're theoretically encouraging obesity. So next time somebody wants to bitch about "fat people" or complain about them being slobs and having no discipline or self restraint, take a step back you asshole and quit buying bagged salads. Real talk.
On an unrelated note, let's take a moment to root for the Cleveland Cavaliers. The Saints just won the superbowl, and the Cavaliers could make this year a double franchise cherry popping. I believe we have all the pieces, and if we end up losing it'll be because of some intangible like a lack of confidence or not being playoff/championship ready. I have an inkling that at least Mo Williams will be the type to choke. The pop vendors at my work made this display, and it rules.
I also hate the American blend salad, and I think it's the equivalent of buying a factory sealed bag of hard brown floaters; the American blend salad is just iceberg, radish, and carrots. If you can find yourself some italian dressing you can have yourself a salad from Olive Garden or a side salad from Wendys. Fucking fantastic.
Most of the bagged salads are made of up cheap ingredients, other than the Parisian blend with frisee. One other exception is the popular Italian blend, which is actually one of the relatively better deals since it has endive in it and it's among the cheapest salads. Bagged salads however, on a whole, still represent a major wallet fucking and the small population that I referenced in a previous entry that believe salads are the only healthy thing you can eat. They sell so fucking quickly and people toss the fuck out of the bags. I constantly have to put misplaced salads into their proper feeders, since customers have to toss a salad they second guessed into the feeder immediately below where it goes - because it's an inconvenience to reach a few inches higher and place it in its proper fucking place. The worst is when customers throw bagged salads ontop of potatoes or in random unrefridgerated places. Dicks.
Right now I'm pretty "salty" because I have cuts all over my right arm from shoving salads behind the feeders. I get really antsy when there are tons of customers crowding my space, and I just shove salads in their feeders as quickly and carelessly as possible. Every customer thinks I'm obligated to step back every time one of them wants through the aisle, instead of walking a few feet away and taking another clear path. Nope, their path has to somehow involve them being intrusive in my work.
Bagged salads bother me on a deeper level, because they are a perfect manifestation of the pampered, powdered, and dick-rubbed lives of convenience that Americans simply cannot abandon. All of those conveniences tallied up are a key contributer to our high obesity rates, and by opting convenience over slow and hard work you're theoretically encouraging obesity. So next time somebody wants to bitch about "fat people" or complain about them being slobs and having no discipline or self restraint, take a step back you asshole and quit buying bagged salads. Real talk.
On an unrelated note, let's take a moment to root for the Cleveland Cavaliers. The Saints just won the superbowl, and the Cavaliers could make this year a double franchise cherry popping. I believe we have all the pieces, and if we end up losing it'll be because of some intangible like a lack of confidence or not being playoff/championship ready. I have an inkling that at least Mo Williams will be the type to choke. The pop vendors at my work made this display, and it rules.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Entry #8: Cleaning
The following entry may end up being one of the shortest entries I'll ever write. It's not often that I'll say anything adverse about my workplace, incase it somehow finds this blog and my job is jeopardized. My work does relatively more beneficial things for the community than most larger grocers. As I already stated in a previous entry, my work offers a few local options including local produce (zucchini, eggplant, yellow squash, tomatoes, pumpkins, green beans, etc.), Cleveland tofu, breads from local European bakeries, Janka brand pierogies and blintzes, and a few other "authentic European" items of Ohio origin and a few brands that may possibly be larger but are still located here in Ohio. My workplace is also pro-union, offers dental insurance and miminal eyeglass insurance, and treats its workers relatively well.
That all being said, it's pretty fucking dumb that corporate requires standardized chemicals be used for cleaning purposes. Back at the last location I worked at, I cleaned using lemon juice. That shit was natural and didn't harm product. Today I was cleaning a table underneath some clementines, and because our regional supervisor was in the store I had to use "citrus" cleaning chemical. It says this shit is "natural," but it also says that it's not to make direct contact with any product. I personally find it fucked up that I have to clean with unsafe-for-human-consumption chemicals just because our company is too worried about shrink to squish a few lemons.
That all being said, it's pretty fucking dumb that corporate requires standardized chemicals be used for cleaning purposes. Back at the last location I worked at, I cleaned using lemon juice. That shit was natural and didn't harm product. Today I was cleaning a table underneath some clementines, and because our regional supervisor was in the store I had to use "citrus" cleaning chemical. It says this shit is "natural," but it also says that it's not to make direct contact with any product. I personally find it fucked up that I have to clean with unsafe-for-human-consumption chemicals just because our company is too worried about shrink to squish a few lemons.
On a lighter note, we sell aspiration in the produce department. Who ever said that working in retail was a dead-end job?
Entry #7: Lines
Every post thus far on this blog has had some event or catalyst that caused me to write each entry. Earlier today I just got back from hanging out with my friends for a few days and had absolutely no money left on my person. Normally I don't carry my wallet or anything like a credit card or debit card, and the cash that I do carry is usually under $30. I feel like it's a safety precaution, and it also prevents me from overspending. I'm 6'1'', 220lbs - so the dumb motherfucker who actually would try and jump me without a gun would probably only get a twenty spot for all the hassle.
Anyways, I ran out of cash. I decided, since it's Thursday, to stop by my work and pick up my paycheck - so I could pay for something to eat before heading home. So I'm off the bus and back into my neighborhood at around 2:30pm, and upon arrival my work has a fucking line for customer service all the way to the fucking door. It was two fucking thirty, on a Thursday. That means most adults are working and most kids are still in school. The entire line was senior citizens or people in handicapped carts buying fucking cigarettes. Fucking cigarettes!
Lots of people will get pissed at me, but fuck cigarettes all the way to hell. Not only is it shitty to be buying cigarettes, and it's shitty to be in line at customer service for anything other than a return of an outdated or damaged product, cashing in a lottery ticket, or picking up a paycheck - but you can buy cigarettes at any fucking lane. It's not only restricted to the customer service line, you geriatric pricks. If you're buying cigarettes in any other lane the cashier will walk over to customer service and walk back with whatever you want; all you're doing by standing in line for customer service is wasting valuable time for people with legitimate concerns.
What else pisses me off about lines? I hate self checkout lanes and their popularity. If it's not past midnight, I feel like a total douche using self checkout. Self checkout lanes are putting people out of jobs; people who say otherwise are fucking morons, considering it only takes one worker to monitor every self checkout.
Putting people out of jobs is one of the shittiest things a person can do. It's like asshole customers who file complaints or write letter/email complaints. Why don't you risk being confrontational and just tell the worker in question what you're displeased with, instead of playing some sneaky roundabout ninja shit and fucking them preemptively. Every person who's ever made another person lose their job due to some self important customer complaint should be placed in an oven like they used in the holocaust. Not that anybody reads this blog, but incase: I don't condone the holocaust, shut the fuck up.
Anyways, I ran out of cash. I decided, since it's Thursday, to stop by my work and pick up my paycheck - so I could pay for something to eat before heading home. So I'm off the bus and back into my neighborhood at around 2:30pm, and upon arrival my work has a fucking line for customer service all the way to the fucking door. It was two fucking thirty, on a Thursday. That means most adults are working and most kids are still in school. The entire line was senior citizens or people in handicapped carts buying fucking cigarettes. Fucking cigarettes!
Lots of people will get pissed at me, but fuck cigarettes all the way to hell. Not only is it shitty to be buying cigarettes, and it's shitty to be in line at customer service for anything other than a return of an outdated or damaged product, cashing in a lottery ticket, or picking up a paycheck - but you can buy cigarettes at any fucking lane. It's not only restricted to the customer service line, you geriatric pricks. If you're buying cigarettes in any other lane the cashier will walk over to customer service and walk back with whatever you want; all you're doing by standing in line for customer service is wasting valuable time for people with legitimate concerns.
What else pisses me off about lines? I hate self checkout lanes and their popularity. If it's not past midnight, I feel like a total douche using self checkout. Self checkout lanes are putting people out of jobs; people who say otherwise are fucking morons, considering it only takes one worker to monitor every self checkout.
Putting people out of jobs is one of the shittiest things a person can do. It's like asshole customers who file complaints or write letter/email complaints. Why don't you risk being confrontational and just tell the worker in question what you're displeased with, instead of playing some sneaky roundabout ninja shit and fucking them preemptively. Every person who's ever made another person lose their job due to some self important customer complaint should be placed in an oven like they used in the holocaust. Not that anybody reads this blog, but incase: I don't condone the holocaust, shut the fuck up.
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